The Secret I Told

My essay from the Secrets reading

In June,

rayne fisher-quann

invited me to read at an event in New York hosted in a beautiful church on the Upper West Side. I had to read someone else’s secret, and someone had to read mine. When my friends caught wind of this, they said, “Marlowe, you don’t even have any secrets.” Maybe not to my FRIENDS! but there are certain things I’ve never written about and this is one of them… Enjoy! If you were there the night of the reading, mine was the first secret that was read that evening by the fabulous P.E. Moskowitz.

Next week a new SMALL JOINTS is coming and I think it’s going to be a long one. Stay tuned!

I have always been very bad at negotiations. On behalf of other people, I am a bulldog—but for myself—quel dommage. Salary expectations, rates per word, quotes for work, I really put myself on discount... In 2018 I spent a rather unsuccessful year dipping my toe into Seeking Arrangements. At first it was out of necessity, I was babysitting and working a job in fashion and needed a taste of luxury just to make the rest of my life feel worth it. I was living in overdraft, and a few hundred here and there from men would not only be helpful, but very funny. I had bravely given up on the idea that I would become a writer and settled into the fate of being myself.

I despised the language of Seeking Arrangements. In general, “kinks” can stand to be a little more sophisticated. My bio read “Sometimes sassy. Spoiled, bratty domme.”